No.6194
>>5847Music really does help. It’s one of the best therapies for me.
No.6280
>>6278Anon, self learning can be so much easier now compared to the generation of people who live in back then. With the power of Ai where you could reach from just your finger tips, you can have your own personal tutor right away.
The only hurdle is that do you have what it takes to digest all these knowledge form AI. Witouut a proper mindset preparation, it can leads to getting yourself burnout and stress expecially when you try to build your learning curve from scratch.
No.6288
4chan is down again, so I'm here once again ruining everything for everybody :)
No.6289
Does anyone want to talk? I feel bored and lonely. ;_;
No.6290
I was very kind to one person, my only friend in a long time, then I found out that they did not liked me and were just using me. It was very painful and I decided to hurt them too and then burned the bridges. Now I feel extreme resentment and pain that just does not stop, constantly ruminating because there was a chance but now I don't know what to do anymore, how can I be kind ever again.
No.6291
>>6290Sorry to hear that. You'll overcome it, don't worry. Also don't renew relationships with unkind people. Find someone else to talk to as soon as possible. Wish you well.
No.6292
>>6289The only place to talk in real time with Anon here is in the anime stream chat. Assuming if there's any active anon staying on stream chat, yeah we can have a conversation there. I can't think of any other reliable and effective method that are simple have a chat with wapchan's anon.
No.6327
kindmin how is /kind/ related to 39?
No.6345
Every other time somebody coughs in a raspy voice, I immediately get a Smoker alert and quickly turn around just to remember I don't have an AK with me.
No.6347
>>6339As long as it doesn't get spammy and isn't said in a toxic place, the phrase "A kind place exists" followed by a direct link in a chat might be a strategy. But then there will always be that dumb kid who'll post it on halfchan or fullchan. Or on X. And that would be bad.
The reality is that there are a lot of people looking for a place like this, but they simply don't know it exists. And in that forest, in which they are lost, there are also wolves.
No.6369
>>6351Don't mess with me, friend. I am dangerous. This box won't keep me inside, and you know it.
No.6385
>>6369Then you will be out of the box. Which means you will fail to stay in the box. Because you will be out of the box.
No.6388
Seems I fell in love with Kiki a bit, so now I'm melancholic as hell. Frustrating.
No.6389
wait which year did /kind/ move over to wapchan? My memory is completely messed up on this point.
No.6390
>>6389The year anon cafe died
No.6391
>>6390So, yesterday? It's so weird.
No.6393
It always pains me to remember than kindmin is a former 8channer.
No.6413
i'm so hungry. i want to eat something substantial
No.6414
>>6413How substantial?
うぐぅ！
うぐぅ！
うぐぅ！
No.6415
>>5234lurking and laughed at this, thanks anon
うぐぅ！
うぐぅ！
うぐぅ！
No.6416
I feel like I wasted my 20s doing nothing, being a NEET, not completing any projects I want to work on, never had a romantic relationship, no friends, no career, chronic unemployment. I am wasting my life.
うぐぅ！
うぐぅ！
うぐぅ！
No.6417
Ayu... Ayu...Anyway come watch our streams! Free headpats and your life gets meaning again!
うぐぅ！
うぐぅ！
うぐぅ！
No.6418
>>6416I’m a little younger than you, but same. No friends, never had a relationship, no goals. I’m just going to keep aging. I really feel disillusioned to everything else.
Maybe we can be friends lol :)
I’ve seen there is a major productivity decrease when I have nothing to do in my life.
At least with all this time you can watch whatever anime, play whatever games, and learn whatever.
I’m yapping too much about my life anyways lol, but what I should be saying is I guess life is like that, and it always changes.
Hope you get out of being a NEET and hey Ayu :D
No.6421
>>6420I just wish I traveled more, made friends, tried dating etc. I'm a full adult now but I still feel stunted, like I never moved past my teen years.
No.6592
[long blogpost]
I've basically been interested in the field of linguistics since I was about 7 (I'm 22 now). Not just languages but the inner workings and machinations of them, their manifestations in the brain/mind, comparing different languages and how they evolve, etc. When I was 17, I decided to begin self-studying mathematics since I was self-conscious about my numerical skills and found I really liked it. Even more than that, I found a good many similarity between mathematics and linguistics and realized that this particular field is what I wanted to do. It was interesting seeing how linguistics informed CS (and especially artificial intelligence) throughout the ages. When I saw a paper on how function composition and category theory can be used to represent the combination of phrases and grammar, or when I saw how word embeddings represent meaning and grammatical function in a multidimensional vector space, I was like "Wow, you can think of language in THAT particular way?"
In any case, I was forced into a business/language studies degree by my mother who didn't know what linguistics was (who I love, still, and don't hold a grudge against her) and it amounted to 4 years of what's mostly a waste of time and knowledge I'll never actually use. I remember walking into a math class right after they were done, and the professor left a bunch of matrices on the board. I wished I could've been doing this instead of what I was doing at the time (analyzing some novel or something, which I sucked at), but it wasn't to be. Switching majors was not an option, because I would have to start back to the first year and at that time I was balancing taking care of my sick dad and studying in another city, I couldn't stand having to do 7 or 8 years in a Bachelor's degree. I just thought that after whatever the Hell, I'd just do what I actually want. I heard from my parents that the Bachelor's doesn't matter as much, it's to get your foot in the door more or less.
I had a pretty specific research vocation in mind and applied to one of the only universities that specialized in it. Keep in mind I had mediocre transcripts because I was under horrific mental strain and had a degree in something that's somewhat unrelated and no university projects to show for it. Other people I saw who were accepted had projects under their belt, worked with professors, etc. I was just there with a measly 100-line word analyzer for an ancient language and nothing more to show than that. I submitted about 5 months ago, and expected it could carry me through. This could've been my actual break into what I actually want to do; not just that, but it's basically the sign that my enthusiasm and obsession of 15 years wasn't in vain.
Just last month, I got it back: I was rejected. Not for ineligibility but because of competition. I plan on reapplying with a better statement of purpose that shows I actually know some, but I'm still pissed that other people who have the work done beforehand can write what amounts to a chronology of their research with "That's why I want to be there" interspersed. I hate to say I'm resentful because resentment is one of the things I think kills the soul, but I can't help it at that moment. What's worse is I'm blaming it all on myself; if I'm not blaming it on myself, I might be taking it out on my mother and I love her. She's struggled a lot and I hate to add to it.
I have no real life people to talk to about any of my actual ideas. Nor online. There's few people actually interested in the intersection of mathematics and linguistics, and the ones that are are PhD-holding academics with busy lives, researches to carry out and students to supervise, there's not much time they have for a person like me. Not even being condescending to them, I mean this in earnest; I think the utilitarian calculus on that is clear ("Hmmm, should I stick to my work and supervise my students or listen to the half baked ideas of some far-off 22 year old kid with no background?").
I can't help but feel like my interest and work is meaningless and complete nonsense; there's people who like math, people who like linguistics, and the 5 people in the world who like both. I don't know if I should even continue. I feel insane for holding onto the hope of being heard by someone who can actually vouch for me. I've spoken to a few professors, shot emails back and forth though they're rarely long and only come with one response or two before I write a response and they just never respond. They're busy people, and that's fine. But in the end, no one really listens. I feel like my entire work and interest has been one massive hallucination that no one in existence can see.
[/blogpost]
No.6603
>>6592>feel like my entire work and interest has been one massive hallucination that no one in existence can see. If it is of any solace, advertising agencies and three letter friends most likely use the intersection of linguistics and mathematics to fine tune their global skinner boxes.
Perhaps the question worth asking is how do you hope to profit from your ventures?
As long as you can point to some sort of goal or objective, some sure gain, then everything can flow from that.
No.6639
>>6637Judging from how you view others who don't fit your standard it probably is manipulation and narcissism. Either that or self-hatred and projection.
No.6640
>>6639That's incredibly shallow, friend, but at least it's a direct response.
To reflect on your point, what "others" are we talking about? Are they in the room with us? What are they saying right now? Oh right, they aren't saying anything, because that's their whole point, isn't it? It's almost like they don't exist enough to consider themselves offended.
No.6682
>>6640Others refers to other people. They exist, you can go outside to find them. What are you even talking about?
No.6712
>>6686What's the point of being upset that you've been caught? If you were doing something wrong then you already caught yourself doing something wrong. Why else would you be framing it as immoral, especially since you already have knowledge of the morality of your own actions? Doesn't the knowledge that you should feel guilty set the stage for you being guilty?
No.6719
>>6701Being a gaijin and trying to be original with the sentence structure instead of using the "canned" ways you should.
No.6737
I wrote a poem and wanted to share it, but figured nobody cares, so I didn't.
No.6745
To Botan and Ibuki
She steps into the water of an open air bath
And there's a sunset over the dark sea.
Almost a dream in which the purple sky
Is shared by these two setting suns.
Bright rays of gold fall on the surface like
A garden of white lilies, shaded by the changing light;
And under it, beneath the calming waves,
There's all the warmth of day
With all temptations of the morning
That's met in bed under a shared blanket.
Why are you watching?
What are you looking at?
Haven't you seen it all before?
A thousand sunsets.
But not this one… the light dims,
And blending with the waves
The clouds are soft and gentle:
Their lavender and pink, surrounded by the stars.
The water ripples, the light fades,
And only stillness of the night remains there.
Not bright, not colorful,
But caring, familiar, inviting.
No.6751
>>6745That's pretty nice, thanks for sharing!